Year End South Africa

We have survived Christmas. Every year this is a stressful time to many around the globe. Running mad, Looking for ideal gifts. Preparing for the end of one year and the beginning of another. This year has been testing for many South Africans.

All South Africans have united against the current ruling party. Some may be under the illusion the apartheid was our greatest battle. No it is Jacob Zuma! Many have finally hit the realization that the current president is not working out so well (better late than never I suppose). In 1994 one man set South Africa free. Now another man will try to break us. Yes unfortunately the current president is incapable of basic math skills, but the rest of us aren't too shabby so we're counting down.

Our police force is so corrupt its not even funny. We fear them more than we fear the criminals. The one thing they're good at, is lazing about. Calling them in any emergency means giving up. I have tried to get assistance from them numerous times. I am still waiting...

We still have our amazing sense of humor. After all produced "The Laughing President"!

From the whole Oscar Pistorius situation to Trevor Noah making us proud by hosting The Daily Show. Funny enough, Trevor Noah pointed out that Oscar Pistorius has put all South Africans on equal footing. Now crime is no longer a 'black thing', every race is capable of crime. Personally I feel some one that walks/runs on Blades would be the capable of murder. Imagine the damage he could do if he did karate...

This had been the year of marching. From people who were unhappy with their jobs and pay, to being fed up with the running of the country. With a government that has been playing us like a board game.

We have learnt how to deal with both water and power outages. Bring on the Apocalypse. We've got this.  You name it, we can handle it. We're natural survivors.
We have gased up out homes. and we're kicking it and making fires. We know how to rough it out.

We have for some reason been trying to Americanize our country. Got Burger king, Krispy Kreme, and now there is talk of a Star Bucks popping up. The lingo has changed drastically in South Africa. Dress codes have changed. We seem to be losing all that makes us South African. 

Every time America drops off another one of their famous stores on our shores, South Africans line up to get some of the American experience. Don't get get me wrong I am in love with Krispy Kreme. 

It's just sad that when speaking to many South Africans about voting at the next Elections, they point blank refuse to participate. They feel that standing in a queue is a waste of their precious time. Lets hope with all the practice they have had with lining up for food, they will happily line up to set things right in our home land.

We are ready for you 2016. You CAN NOT bring a South African down!

#ZumaMustFall

The latest in South Africa is the "Zuma must fall" march. As South Africans we have had just about enough of these government employees getting a free ride. At the end of the day it is their job to negotiate better conditions for the rest of the country not fill their own pockets, and providing cushy lifestyles for their families at our expense. While the rest of the country is simply trying to make ends meet. These people seem to think they are untouchable, that we will continue to sit quietly in a corner and be quiet. I am glad people are now taking a stand.

                                               

This country went through an exciting change on the 10 of May 1994. When Nelson Mandela was elected the first black president. Every race and age united as we welcomed a new age for our country. The name Nelson Mandela is renown worldwide for all that he has accomplished in his lifetime, and for our country. He was jointly awarded the Nobel Prize with FW De Klerk for the new democratic South Africa in 1993. He had such big dreams for this country and the people of this country. He would be disgusted to see how far it has fallen.

                                   

Now once again the country has been united in the removal of current president Jacob Zuma. On the 16 December 2015 South Africans from all walks of life united once again to march against President Zuma, people have now reached the point of 'enough'. The #ZumaMustFall march. We've been through so much as a country. There is no reason we have to put up with a president who can't take anything serious. He laughs everything everything off, this is clearly all one big joke to him. This joke is on us.
 No South African can truly mean when they say "Life was simpler, during the apartheid". Though people are being pushed to resent the current ruling party, the ANC. They are just buggering everything up.
This is the same man who believes AIDS can be washed away by a hot shower.
Here is an article about the sex and AIDS issue.
http://sbeta.iol.co.za/news/south-africa/zuma-stands-his-ground-on-shower-comment-277106

He is a complete joke! Does this man honestly see nothing wrong with standing in front of millions (billions, trillions and one) and making a complete fool of himself.

Our Very Own Wrecking Ball!

God alone knows what reason they have changing the street names. We're left baffled. Not even navigation tools know where to send us anymore. Type in "Albertina Susulu", you will get ten options in completely different areas. What's the purpose of this beside messing with our heads. Its bad enough my internal navigation is wonky, just stop already!

Light and water shortages, WOW. Don't get me wrong I do understand they are not completely accountable for the water situation. Yet if they made a plan with all the border jumpers it would help. How can we feed others, when our own countrymen don't have sufficient supplies. Let me not get started on the squatters (informal settlements). Good grief, I have seen squatters (informal settlements) with cars, Satellite TV, etc. So how much suffering could they be enduring?

https://youtu.be/kJ8soh2C_bA

Even the children are complaining.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iJ3v1VbBS7Y


Mandela fought for the people of South Africa's freedom, it is time for us now to take a stand a fight for ourselves. Don't allow government to bully us.
FYI the rest of us can read, write and count!

Yo-yo people...

People in general amaze me. Lately I have realized most people are like yo-yo's. Now they're up, then they're down. They can't seem to decide what level they are on. It is very annoying because the rest of us can't be too sure where we stand!

Personally I find it easier to avoid switching. When I choose to befriend someone, That's it! I will be loyal until the very end and no matter what I expect that loyalty to be returned. If it is not returned I will immediately withdraw my friendship without a second glance back. I feel it makes everyone's lives less complicated, Especially mine!

I guess that's why so many people are drawn to Facebook, "It's complicated!"
Nothing in life is complicated. People CHOOSE to complicate life. More interested in being fake and putting up a front. When anything happens in their lives, they quickly  run to social media to upload a post. No one cares that your toddler has "passed" preschool. WOW, what an achievement! I would be interested if anyone could possibly fail...
Why would anyone feel the need to advertise every aspect of their personal lives. I feel the only people who deserve to know more detailed information about your life is the people who interact with you often, Not necessarily daily.

I don't get the logic in posting pictures sitting at work. Who has time to take pictures when you are at work? Most people go and do their jobs. Not to Take A Selfie. How sad and pathetic your life must be that you need a job to brag about! I mean, really now, so many people are truly desperate for work. While other idiots decide, " Hey I'm bored, I need a job". Then those are the very same ones who can't grasp basic English! I'm no genius, yet I can make a basic sentence.

I give my best to others, then they can still return around and bad mouth me. Quite frankly, I'm so over it! So now I focus on me and mine. At this point those people who hurt and offend me should be grateful I ignore them instead of telling them how I truly feel. It would definitely provide relief for my own spirit, not so much for them.

How about these 'parents' who brag about their offspring, yet they are too busy/tired to deal with them. I see the parents are kitted up, looking fly. While the children look like they've escaped an orphanage. I simple don't get it. I would sacrifice myself for my children in a heart beat, whether it's food or clothing. How do you have children, yet feel that your partner outranks them! Those poor kids, I can't imagine anything worse than being maybe second in my own moms eyes! I imagine that would be the ultimate rejection.

  

Crushed spirit

Funny how people view each other. No one stops and thinks how their actions and/or words affect others. They don't realize just how easy it can be to break someone's spirit. Especially when that person is already at breaking point. They assume things are all hunky dory with that person simply because they happen not to be whinny cows. I realize now how messed up life can be. Even if you give your all to people they will turn around and utterly crush you, as if your nothing.

We're all different, I get that, How do you expect people to believe you care about them, when you can't be bothered by how they feel. Why are people amused by others failures and fears. Don't act like you're immune. We all feel pain. Which I suppose is a good thing. It is a reminder that we are alive, but how alive can you be when you feel numb for the most part of life. It is easy to tune out feelings, esp when majority of them are completely crushing to the person experiencing those feelings.

I don't remember when last I sang from the pit of my stomach, danced until my body ached, Laughed until my face and stomach hurt.

I guess I am now getting tired of the weight I am constantly carrying. Tried speaking to people they were kind enough to point out I am always negative. Obviously that's what it is. My negativity! Has nothing to do with when I do for others I'm wonderful. Then when things are good in their lives, they reject me. Has nothing to do with how people laugh at me or belittle me. No. It's clearly all me, as I control how others perceive and respond to me.

For years I've been told I am too hard. I need to let go. Open up. Allow people in. So far all I have received from that, is heartbreak.
The strangest part about all of this is how those very people can turn around and remind me how they are hurting. Silly of me to think I would or should matter.

Oh... let's not forget how "I need to learn to be selfish, stop putting others ahead of myself". Funny, some of those "caring" people don't take time out from their busy lives to stop and attempt to connect to me. Check in whether I am okay? Well... can't blame them, They've got their own problems. Why would I matter when it does not benefit them?

One thing I am certain of, is that I am tired. Often I am convinced that no longer existing would be better than living broken.
All I have in this world is my family and my kids. They need me. So I keep quiet an go on.
Living a life where you only exist is a complete waste. I need to figure this out. For mine and my children's sake.

Book Review; Traces of I by Tracy Kiss

I thoroughly enjoyed this book started reading it the afternoon, ended up having burnt food. I enjoy books that are gripping .

This book is for all woman, moms and teenager girls maybe boys too. This definitely applies to everyone.
The lady in this book was 100% relatable. I'm certain many woman will read this book and see aspects of themselves in it. It shows us that woman from different cultures and backgrounds have similar experiences in life, love and how we view ourselves. Too often us as woman go through experiences and feel completely alone. This story proves that we're more alike than we know. It's very important who we allow into our lives and choose to share our lives with. It is even more important to be the most important person in our own lives. No one is above you.

April (the main character) goes through so many experiences all at the same time. She is dealing with numerous personal battles that hit her unexpectedly. My heart bled for her as she was fighting to find a better version of herself. As woman it is so important to know our worth and value. Regardless how others perceive us. I was captivated by this story. Eager to see how April would approach each situation. This story takes you into her mind, how life and people affect us all. What defines us. The battles we all go through within ourselves.

April might seem like a total mess to others, personally I have often wondered about the very questions she asks. The complexities of relationships. The emotions involved in two people sharing one life and how they are affected by each other.

I suppose the moral of the story is about loving oneself, regardless how others may perceive you. Your own happiness must come before all others. Those who truly love you who will stand by and support you no matter what. Those who don't, don't belong in your life. All we need to find is self acceptance and self preservation.

Get your very own copy at Amazon. So you can walk along with April as she searches for answers on who she is and who she needs to be.  The transformations she goes through in her search for personal happiness. 

<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/27881102-traces-of-i" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px"><img border="0" alt="Traces Of I" src="https://d.gr-assets.com/books/1448261686m/27881102.jpg" /></a><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/27881102-traces-of-i">Traces Of I</a> by <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/14254930.Tracy_Kiss">Tracy Kiss</a><br/>

My rating: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/1457831996">5 of 5 stars</a><br /><br />

<br/><br/>

<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/list/33597218-abigail">View all my reviews</a>

Delayed South Africa

This is a short blog...

As usual South Africa has a lot of catching up to do. I have started blogging as a means to communicate with the outside world.

This concept is foreign to many South Africans. I have received many different opinions. Most people seem to think I am doing this for attention. Others feel it's childish and a waste of time. I have decided to do this because I actually enjoy it. I love the fact that I can sit at home and still reach so many people from different countries. I wish others could see the joys and possibilities in it.

I am hopeful that this will one day bare fruit and grow into something amazing. Until then I am quite grateful that I do this and receive enjoyment out of it. This is the one thing that I possess that is all mine. There is no need to consider anyone.

Being a stay-at-home mom is difficult as is. It has many limitations, and lots of people to consider. I  appreciate having this outlet.

It saddens me when I think that so many people are unaware as to the wonders of the internet. A lot of people see the bad only, they refuse to see all that one can achieved by simply using this tool. Many people around the world are using this to make millions. Yet South Africans fail to see this.
hopefully in the near future they will see it too.

Most people in this country are too busy minding everyone else business. That why they fail to make anything of their own lives. So the only people to blame for their sad lives are themselves.

The other reason I blog is that this provides me with the platform to be myself completely. To say whatever I feel to be true. Of course I expect people to judge me but that is none of my business.
The most important thing in life is to be true to oneself. Do what makes you happy regardless what others think. If that does upset others, that's just a bonus!!!



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Life of a mom at home

I have been quiet lately, as I have been busy looking into a few work from home options. Mostly surveys and PTC. These have been time consuming and slow. I didn't expect anything different. Though recently I have been feeling like I need more. So much needs to be done financially and slow and steady just wont work.

I could finally have found what I've been looking for, not yet sure. I have to admit, thus far I have tried a few options. All sorts of lies and empty promises, that out of desperation, I found myself falling for them. Of course I obviously have doubts. Unfortunately these things require money. So at some point we find ourselves scooping money out anyways. It's difficult, being a parent who wants to provide all that we never had for our children.  

Without any doubt I intend on continuing with the surveys and PTC options. They keep me busy, and I am curious to see how they pan out.

The most important thing in life is to always do your best, and find what makes you happy. Sad thing for myself, is that I am still to find out what that is. I find myself in a situation where I still don't know where I belong, nor what I should do. I have tried many different options. They were not for me. Currently I personally feel that working from home would suit me best. Not interested in the 9 to 5 options. Also, working from home, means I still get to play a major role in my family's lives. I can go visit family whenever the mood strikes me, and make sure my children are taken care of. I don't trust anyone else with that task.

There most certainly are ways to make money from home. That is the reason I have not given up. How can I give up when I am so close?

You are closest to your dreams when you finally have nothing more to lose. I have now reached that point. Hit rock bottom, yet for some reason I have not yet given up. I still see the light at the end of the tunnel. Normally at this point I would have long given up. This time around I know that I am so close, that giving up is no option. That knowledge is exciting and scary. It's good that even when people are looking at me and see hopelessness I can still find my light.

No matter what you may find yourself in. It is never too late. We are all different and things are set out for us at different times. I am learning to be okay with that. I feel it is better for me to cut myself off from others. Having to listen to them drudge on about their sad and pathetic lives is draining and none of my business. Also those annoying braggers who feel the world revolves around them.  They tend to bring you down and suck the good and positive about of you.

Don't give up, as long as you're still running the race is not over!

Be your own best friend

How often do we wake up and realize we have been neglecting ourselves. We're so busy giving and doing for everyone else, that doing anything for yourself seems near impossible. I have tried on numerous occasions to put me first, (has not yet worked out in my favor).

I know so many other women who find themselves in this same predicament. Once we become responsible for our loved ones, that becomes our soul purpose in life. So many discussions are brought up about how unhealthy this type of lifestyle can be. Even with that knowledge, breaking out of that habit seems so far out of reach.

I am aware that there are woman who are capable of separating their personal lives from their family lives. So that means it is achievable. I am in absolute awe of them, hopefully I can get to that point myself.
Every time I've attempted, I found myself drowning in guilt. I'd beat myself up for neglecting my responsibilities. Then feel guilty about thinking of putting my needs first, for not following through and achieving my goals. For even considering putting myself ahead of the others. Jumbled emotions that swell inside to the point of near explosion. Can't do that either, it might upset everyone else.

Lately I have realized the kids are growing up, where would that leave me?
Fortunately blogging has provided me with an outlet to blurt out these thoughts of randomness. I have sat down tried to think of things I used to enjoy, I now find those things bore me.

I suppose the other side to my issues are my past. Constantly being reminded of my failures, hearing I'm a bad parent. Being blamed for everything that possibly could go wrong in life. I could be holding onto that as some sort of crutch and reminder to never let go. That I should be readily available for everyone, but myself.

It doesn't help having the knowledge that so many people outside are capable of harming our kids, then people have the audacity to call that paranoia. How does it make you paranoid when these disturbing stories are true? As a parent, our job is to protect our children. Which means, being alert to any and all possible dangers. Can't trust just anyone with our most prized possessions.

I used to be the type of person that did my own thing. No one could make me do anything I didn't want to. These days I seem to fall for any sob story, because of my nature I make it an absolute nightmare for those who force me to do what I don't want to. As I start feeling angry that they try to steal my free will. so that makes me bitter.

I am starting to see that I do matter. I need to take better care of me, regardless how anyone else feels about my choices. If they choose to have my choices affect them, then that's on them not me.

Love yourself and enjoy your own company. Be your own best friend!

Time to grow up.

Life in South Africa

Wow...
What a country to live in. The things we tolerate in this country in ridiculous.

Our beloved E-Toll.
How did they think that would make sense? No one is going to pay to drive on their own roads. Seriously, these roads have been around longer than most of us have been alive. So why should we pay to use them? Most people have decide to completely boycott this process. They do have a valid point. To top this off, when this came out they offered people the choice. To sign up or not. No one in their right mind would choose to sign up to support government anymore than we already have. I spoke to numerous people who are furious at this.

Now we have to deal with power and water outages too. I wonder often is this South Africa or Somalia? We are not used to this. Now each household needs to make alternate plans for the power and water outages. Kind of makes sense for people to choose to relocate. Living here becomes more and more of a disadvantage. How are we too contend with the top dog countries at this rate. We can't even provide our own country with the basics. Seems now like once a week (or if we're lucky a month) we have lights out. This is not okay. Especially the households with elderly and/or babies. The rest of us can get by fine. Not those two groups. Thankfully I am not in that situation. Though I definitely get annoyed when I can charge Ipads or Smartphones. I'm sure many people would agree that can be quite annoying

Don't get me wrong I am quite aware that we currently have a drought. That has nothing to do with the government. I do though wish they would attempt something to help the matter. I can't imagine how under privileged people in SA are surviving this. Fortunately we are in a position where we can go to a shop to buy water. Not very many people have that luxury. Suppose this should be the part where we come together and unite in this. Help our fellow brethren. It costs most people nothing, but mean the world to others.

Funny when I watch television and see things things people are whining about it. We have become ungrateful brats. How often (if ever) do we take a moment out of our busy days and just be thankful for what we have.

Before you go to bed tonight make a list of all you have to be grateful for before you close your eyes.

Great South Africa update

Have you heard...?

So rumor has it that Oscar Pistorius (Blade Runner) is going to have his own reality show.
Good grief, just when I thought this country can't surprise me anymore, they go ahead and prove me wrong. How is it possible that a person can go from killing his supermodel girlfriend Reeva Steenkamp. His "jail time" was something strange as well. Where have you heard your get preferential treatment in prison? Many prisoners who have disabilities in prison get the same treatment as other inmates. He was released a day earlier (because why not). Now he is going to make money with a reality show about his house arrest. This is completely insane. How is this fair? I was aware that we were not fans of punishing criminals in our country, but to full on reward them?
I hope and pray this is not true, that this is another pointless rumor. That doesn't come to light.

It's enough we've had to deal with the Kardashians. Who get rewarded for doing absolutely nothing but being fake (surgeries, Botox and all). Not forgetting they've provided us with "I am Cait" (who I heard might be considering go back to a man...). These people who claim to value their family, yet we hear about the many ways Kris Jenner is monetizing her children's lives constantly. Now they all have apps that they also get money from. I struggle to understand why people would even take that into consideration. We have no reason to believe that their characters on TV are even real.

Gosh, these reality show are utter rubbish. Sure they are handy when you just want to watch mindless crap. Though, to actually be hooked and to follow or idolize them is somewhat insane. If this what happens when we're left unattended, we might need 24/7 supervision.

As is, this country is already in big trouble having a president that struggles with basic counting skills.We are a huge joke. YouTube is having a ball with our "counting president". I mean really, even toddlers know that numbers follow a certain sequence. Though they're forgiven for messing it up sometimes, as they are still learning. Also they are simply adorable!!!! Goodness me we've given this man the responsibility of an entire country. Well, We're to blame for that. Lets see what happens at the next election.

At least no one can blame us for not having an amazing sense of humor. Living here we're used to laughing at ourselves and being laughed at. We never dull. Wonder what tomorrow holds for our country.

I swear, I just can't deal with all this stupidity. We're good people, so why should we have to deal with all this torture.

My dear friend, Depression!

So...
I am aware I have been quiet for some time. I have been busy in a battle with my good old friend depression. This has been ongoing for a few days. Yesterday I hit my breaking point and allowed myself to break down while in the bath last night. Everything built up to the boiling point. Being a person who doesn't grant herself permission to have any offensive emotions, means that I take and take until I eventually break. Unfortunately, the price it comes at is that my family suffers at the brunt of my boiling. This is not at all my intention, I am fully aware as to how messed up and abnormal this is, esp being a female. They are usually in tune and rather verbal with their emotions.

So much doubt, stress and pressure, Of course they are all self inflicted. That's how I roll. Physically and emotionally drains a person, being in constant turmoil. Takes the smallest issues to snap, as I am hovering on the edge of anyway.

This surely confirms everyone's suspicions, I am abnormal! Not even sure if this is a good or bad thing, but this is who I am. It could possibly also explain why I view people and life so differently. I surely am a unique specimen.

One day when I am a big girl, who knows, I might change. Might grow up, and feel comfortable dealing with this "emotion situation" thing. For now, I would simple be happy not having to deal with any of it, That is just easier for me.

It certainly doesn't help that I find myself surrounded by people who are completely obsessed with the sound of their own voices and and problems. They ask how I am doing, yet before I even take the breathe to respond they're already on a full on rampage about their unimportant crap.

One person, so many complications, Yes, I multitask too!

Poor Barry, the kids and my family. They must all be saints. I for one would be done with this. All this crazy, and no knowledge on how to deal with this bubbling insanity. I am amazed they if they haven't regularly considered tossing me into the loony bin, ( I heard you receive a free bag of oranges for every nut-head you bring in).

If you do or have ever found yourself in this scenario, you're not alone. We wackos need to stick together!!!!

Please feel free to subscribe and share my blogs, I don't mind. The crazy WILL survive and MUST go around!!!!

Keep looking ahead

We all fall on tough times. It all depends on you as an individual. Are you going to allow you situation to affect your character? Will it determine your mood?

I definitely do understand it is never an easy position to find yourself in, especially when you are a parent. As parents we want to provide our children with all we could possible dream of. Ensuring they lack for nothing. That, however, is highly unlikely and unrealistic. What kind of person would they be, if they always get their heart their hearts desire.

Today we had a four year old throw major tantrums because we couldn't take her to the park. Of cos we would need petrol (or gas) to get anywhere. Let's not forget the after park ritual, an ice-cream. She want everything under the sun we couldn't provide. As a parent it was terrible tough watching my child request things things that I couldn't provide.

Fortunately, that is where granny comes in handy. Family can be quite useful that way. Throughout this day I've been on the phone with family, talking or chatting. Which was a much needed distraction.

I completely with all my heart do believe. Regardless what's going on where the adults are concerned, we should do our utmost to shield the children from that pointless stress.

Thankfully this day has now ended. We can soon all go to bed, get rest and prepare for a new and exciting day. As sure we can know we can lay our heads down under God's watchful and faithful eyes. We know that tomorrow brings with it new and exciting possibilities.

For that, I hold onto my joy and continue practicing gratitude. In the knowledge that my family are all safe. My kids are happy.

We have the luxury of meals daily, comfortable homes, clothing, health.How can we possible be anything but grateful.

No matter where you find yourself when you wake, and as your day progresses. Just know, it can and will improve.

Keep looking ahead, keep smiling, and keep keeping on.

Life changes

Life had certainly thrown me a few curve balls. Where I found myself in awful situations, abusive relationship, loss of a child, isolation from loved ones, raped, and so forth. So I had become quite accustomed to 'LIFE' (the version is was experiencing at that time). I was constantly reminded how stupid I was, how unattractive, a terrible person as a whole.

For years we have been taught some people are rich and some are not. I often found myself wondering why that is. Sure, I get that some are born into it, others inherit it, then there are those who accidentally trip and fall into it (at least that's what I figured).

A while back someone recommended I get the book 'The Secret' by Rhonda Byrne. After she had gone into detail about the book, I wanted it so badly. Even though I was aware that getting the book would be highly unlikely, due to major employment drought. It didn't prevent me from wanting it even more.

One day a different friend, who works at a book store, was telling me about the very same book. I expressed how desperately I yearned for a copy of the book. Without a word , sometime later, she dropped off the set by me (by the same author). I was completely stunned, and absolutely filled with with gratitude. I read the books and put some lessons into practice. I noticed that things started to change. I was changing.

Today, my view of life is quite different than how it was previously. Of course some things are the same, that is just part of my personality. A number of family and friends have mentioned the changes. To a degree I find myself isolated (by choice), this is a good thing for me. It gives me the time I need to refocus and get myself back on track. I definitely get derailed as I have this need to help everyone but myself.

Do yourself the greatest of favours get yourself the book, introduce it to your family. I believe it will touch and affect your life in ways you can't even imagine. She gives you simple tasks, yet after completion of each task you will find yourself feeling uplifted. This book it for everyone, those who believe in a higher power and those who don't.

The author is Rhonda Byrne. You have nothing to lose but will definitely gain loads.

Take a stand, make a change

Dear South Africa, 

When are we ever going to learn. We no longer have any excuses. Why do we have a person as the country's representative when that person completely disregards the needs of the people. We have earned the right to vote. To make our own choices. We no longer reside in a country that treats its citizens like filth. So why have we had the same president in office who has provided no solutions, only problems?

Before we know it, it is election time again, then we'll all be sitting with the same question... Who do we vote for? I certainly do understand that thus far we have not received a likely candidate. All the parties who pop up, offer promises and no guarantees. For them it's all about the trimmings and bows. 

As far as I am concerned this is all about power. Most of them have their own ulterior motives as to why they would be fit for the position. They couldn't care less about the condition the country is in. So how do we differentiate? 

Personally, I have no clue as to who to vote for, But I have no doubt that the ANC will NOT receive my vote. A vast majority seem to have the same opinion. Yet strangely they remain in power... 

Seriously, the only way to change that is to appoint someone else. Voting seems somewhat like the LOTTO, all about chance.

This country is in complete turmoil, every man is out for himself. Where is the Ubuntu? What have we become as a nation? 

Lately, the news is bombarded with the Wits students, What about the rest of the nation? The simple man who only wants to provide the bare necessities for his family. As far as I am concerned going to University is a luxury not a necessity. Everyone would love to have that opportunity once they leave school. Yet it will remain but a distant dream for most, as they need to go out and find jobs urgently so that families survive from day to day.

It is time to take a stand! Stand up for the individual as well as for the country as a whole. Every change begins with the individual. Before you go and vote, pay no attention to the promises in their speeches. Allow yourself to be led by your heart. Vote for the party who will stand by you, not the other way around.

We owe this to ourselves, and the late Nelson Mandela, I doubt whether would be very proud of the current condition of the country.

Baby oil Hacks

It is amazing that something we simply buy when we have babies with sensitive skin, can have so many other various uses. Before you throw the last of your baby oil away, consider trying some of these hacks.

1. Removing eye makeup, Clean makeup off using a cotton ball and some baby oil.
2. Cracked heals. After a warm foot soak, Rub the baby oil into your heals, put socks on when you're done. Leave over night. You will see the difference in the morning. 
3. Eliminate earwax buildup removal, (still need try this hack). Apparently you add a few drops into the ear, let it soak for a few minutes. Then tip you head over the other side to allow it to run out onto a tissue. 
4. Wax residue removal. 
5. A bath oil
6. Out of furniture polish? No problem. Add some baby oil to a clean cloth Rub oil into wooden furniture. 
7. As a massage oil.
8. Easy and painless ring removal. 
9. Insulation against the cold, vaseline also works for this purpose.
10. Shaving cream replacement.
11. Cleaning your stainless steel appliances. Add a little to a soft cloth and see the sparkle.

If you can think of any other uses, please feel free to add them.

Protect our children

I have always been protective over my children to the point that people called me paranoid. I simply feel that I am responsible for them, and that I should ensure their safely.

Recently I watched a  program that has fueled my mistrust in humanity. Have been reminded to be aware and alert as to whom I allow to interact with my children. I realize that I have not done enough. There is so much more parents can do. Yet fail to do so, as we feel that our children should be safe with the people that surround them. The danger they are in is so much worse than we could imagine. 

As parents we need to wake up, not have our children pay for our negligence. Why don't we find out more information about the people who teach, coach, and provide transportation to our children. These people are in direct contact with them regularly, without our presence. There is no guarantee of our children's well-being. Regardless whether you have daughters or sons.
The monsters out there will hurt them in ways that are irreversible.

While on the subject of the internet, make sure you are aware of your child's activities online.
Do you know who they interact with, what sites they browse. All this may seem harmless and innocent, but you have no way of telling what the other persons intentions are. So be sure to monitor their internet usage. Best you know that they are safe, than waking up when it is too late, saying "I had no idea".Install software so that you're in the know.

Make sure you are know with who and where your child is 24/7. Regularly remind them about the dangers of strangers. When you leave them with caregivers be sure to provide emergency contact numbers. 

Why wait until your child becomes a victim, when we can do something about it NOW.

In this day and age we have no excuse. The internet provides us with a much wider reach. So we can find out who the bad people are. We have the resources, so let's remain clued in.

Don't keep quiet about this. Let us unite and stand together against these monsters. After all, children belong to us all. so we're all responsible for their safety. Time to show these horrible people they will no longer steal our childrens innocence.

Be sure to regularly check out the Sexual Offences Register. Also if you know of anyone who needs to be added onto it, do so. Let's be make sure our children are protected, and they get to enjoy their youth, not being forced to grow up before their their time.

 For more information please feel free to contact; 

Marc Hardwick

Director

The Guardian

0837966554

To contact a consultant;

031 001 0101

Also have a look at their website;

http://www.the-guardian.co.za/

Please share this with everyone, Get the word out. 

OUR CHILDREN ARE NOT VICTIMS.

Out of place

Have you ever sat in a crowded room room surrounded by people, yet feeling completely alone?

I certainly have. Many times, surely more often than I would care to admit. Which I am certain would surprise my family and friends, as they always see me as the confident type. I most certainly lack in that area in my life. Over the years I have learnt to hide it well enough, to have it pass off as confidence.

I am the greatest loner I know.
My comfort zone is at home, alone. I do understand that this is unhealthy, for myself and my children. The very thought of a simple task as shopping gives me anxiety. There are certain places I simply refuse to go to. In hopes that I avoid people. Can't stand crowded places.

I find there are times when I'm around people I feel pressured to be okay. I have learnt that most people aren't comfortable with other people's feelings. In order to avoid dealing with that, they make their own emotions a priority. This suits me well. I can easily avoid questions on my life, and make everything about them.

In a way it also makes the conversation easier. Personally I choose not having to deal with what I am feeling. Most of the time those feelings are just to overwhelming to deal with. So I immerse myself in other peoples issues. Their problems can be sorted out.

I know this is all in my mind. With time, when I am ready I will deal with these issues.
For now, as long as I am aware to this, I can deal with it on my own terms.

So anyone out there dealing with a similar situation, just know, you're not alone!

Respect and appreciate our Elderly

It breaks my heart when I see our elderly abandoned and forgotten. How can you not see that dumping your parent on an old age home is abusive. I have heard so many horror stories about the abuse that takes place in these homes. How the staff who are employed in these facilities manhandle our loved ones.

After all your parents have done for you, the sacrifices they have made. You turn around and walk away from them without a second look back. Yes you now have your own little family, that doesn't mean your parents should disappear from your life. Makes no sense turning your back on the very person who loved you before you found your footing in life. Keep in mind, just as easily as you make it big you can fall even faster. Then you expect the very person you turned your back on to be there?

I don't care what flaws you see in your parents, don't forget you have your own. Life is about learning and growing and our parents had to endure that same trial.

Instead of walking over them or away from them. Walk with them, trust them to guide you. learn from their mistakes, After all, that's all they want. To have you learn from their mistakes. What's wrong with that? Our parents will always love and protect us.

One day will come when they are no longer there. They will no longer be a nuisance. They will no longer share their past experiences with you. No longer hold and encourage you when you down.
What then?
Will you appreciate them then?

So before it's too long. Spend time with them, speak to them, hold them, tell them you love them.
Tomorrow is no guarantee. Time is running out.

Yellow Bone

So it has been brought to my attention that this term exists. It is used to refer to people who are white. When I was asked what the term meant, I was gob-smacked. Thought it was some form of cancer. *(That made a lot more sense!)

I always knew this world is  insane, but this is a whole other level of craziness. I am still uncertain as to whether this is a term of endearment, or the ultimate insult.

We watched a program yesterday, Where I discovered people are doing strange things in order to lighten their skin, in hopes of looking like a completely different person. I wonder do their own mothers recognize them after that...

All for the sake of your health, sanity and time. Let us work on self love and acceptance.
This process is considered the norm by both men and woman. What examples are we to the children who look up to us, teaching them they are not good enough. What other lesson can a child gain from this?

Bleaching... No girl, you're not rocking that bleached complexion. I'm no fan of tanning and tanning beds either, yet this definitely sounds more harmful. I'm not entirely sure as to what process 'bleaching' entails, but there is no possible way it can be anything good. Why else would they call it 'bleaching'?
No one should feel the need to go to these extreme lengths all in the name of 'beauty'. What is wrong with how you were born? We are all gorgeous in our own unique way.

Embrace your beauty

I swear, only in South Africa!


Please leave your comments on this amazing subject.

The Importance Of Family.

Who are family?

Family are the very people who love and support you, when you're at your lowest. They are the people who see how awesome you are, when you dare not look in the mirror. They stand by, and lift you up. In your absence they defend you.

When I mention "family" I include those friends who have seen you in your darkest and choose to continue loving you. The friends who don't see or speak to you daily, yet both sides feel a bond that is strong enough to last a lifetime. There is something sacred about that silent love.

My family and friends are truly my anchor in life. Often I find myself being swept away by life's hiccups. Sure enough I will find myself being rescued by someone who loves me. I'm not the best at expressing myself emotionally, and they are well aware of that, somehow they know exactly what is needed at that specific time.

How often take our loved ones for granted, thinking tomorrow is a guarantee. We need to wake up, and be more appreciative of who we have in our lives. Regardless whatever fault you find in them. Everyone who enters your life has a purpose.

I usually feel guilty and ashamed, because I find myself in a situation where I can't show my gratitude towards them. By surprising them with a gift of some sort, or contributing financially. When I mention this they are quick to assure me that all they require is my presence, and that adds to my shame and guilt further.

I would not present myself with "the nicest person ever" award. Yet I somehow find myself surrounded by some pretty amazing folk. How blessed am I?

Dear Reader, please take a moment, give a thought, say a prayer for your family.
Even when we throw tantrums and throw our toys out of the cot, those are the very people who would drop everything to be by your side.

Girls don't have it easy...

The things we choose to do to be "attractive",  are insane. Currently myself and my four year old daughter are sitting in bed watching cartoons , while our hair is wrapped in cling-wrap with homemade treatments. (I am feeling sleepy, she is a whole other story...)

This situation has got me thinking about the ridiculous lengths ladies go through, all in the name of "beauty". Aiming for perfection that doesn't exist. Some going as far as completely altering their exterior. Boob jobs, liposuction, botox, etc.

Why can't we just love and appreciate our natural beauty, our uniqueness. I am not a fan of makeup. Mostly because it is so time consuming. The time you take for your "perfect" makeup application you could read a good book, learn something useful. Never-mind how often makeup trends change. There is NO WAY I would sacrifice my precious sleep to wake up extra early just to transform. Let's not forget all the rules you need to follow.

 Also I feel it is terribly deceptive. These poor guys out there. Working so hard to get an opportunity to spend time with you. Only to find out that you don't even look like the person they met! Some girls go that extra mile sleeping with makeup, which is so bad for your skin and bedding.

Don't get me wrong. I am after all a girl, so I most definitely enjoy pamper sessions and treatments. Who doesn't? I love having gorgeous hair, well manicured nails, massages, even wax benefits. I do use eyeliner, mascara and lip-balm, They count as makeup too. Usually barefaced is ideal.

Maybe I'm lazy or maybe I just have other priorities. To each their own and all that jazz.

Yes I don't represent society's ideas of "perfection" but I'm okay with that. I would rather have my daughter knowing she is perfect naturally, than have her learn at an early age she needs to be someone completely different.
Nothing more admirable than a lady confident and comfortable in her own skin.

To all my natural ladies out there, keep doing you and rocking it!!!!

Pregnant criminal in South Africa

The latest is, four women are guilty of house robberies. Apparently one of the women is pregnant. These woman tricked the domestic lady into opening for them. Once inside they then threatened her.

This is completely insane. I don't care what excuse they attempt to suck from their thumbs. It's unacceptable. First we had be concerned about random men approaching your door. Now we can't offer help to pregnant ladies either.

I do understand a lot of people find themselves in horrible financial situations. We've all endured some tough times. That does not give anyone the right to enter some else's property, nor threaten them.

One of the things that bug me, is that one of these ladies (probably not) is pregnant. Usually pregnant ladies can barely think of what clothing wear and baby's arrival. Not scheming how to steal from other people's homes... She obviously did not consider giving birth in prison.

Also I wonder if these wonderful specimen of human beings produced other children , Let's hope they are proud when their kids visit them in prison.

People forget so easily, regardless how bad things may seem. They could always get worse. Come on people most movies teach that lesson.

How easily we look overlook our blessings, because we're too busy envying others. Nothing good will come your way, If no gratitude lives in our hearts. Sad and ugly truth of life.

Well South Africa, let's hope these loving young ladies are caught soon. We have more than enough on our plates to deal with.

Stay blessed.

Mommies are amazing

Fall pregnant, wait anxiously those nine months for the arrival of the newest family member. Each time you think of your little one, you can't help but touch your tummy lovingly.

Time comes for baby. Once baby has been evicted you look down amazed at the abnormal bulge that's still in place. I remember each time I gave birth I wondered if they removed all the kids (I am aware that's a strange thought).

Take the precious bundle home, too excited to notice much of anything else. Three months down the line looking in the mirror when reality hits.
"Why has my baby bump remained on my previously perfectly sculpted abdomen area? Why is my skin cracking, looking like I got in the ring with a tiger..."

Life goes on. Home, kids, husband extended family all need your attention.

Finally you hit 30, time has flown by. The promises you've made to yourself have all been thrown out of the window, "Will get fit and healthy tomorrow!

Ladies, mommies, so naturally self sacrificial. Don't get me wrong I am aware there are mommies out there who are simply brilliant at their own self awareness. Most of us barely can focus on the basics.
I'm lucky if I remember to eat. Even when I bath or take toilet breaks they don't belong to me. (Recently learnt the door does lock...)

We definitely should cherish the moments we have with our little angels. Even though they have the ability sniff you out of anywhere, or shriek you out of anywhere.

Somehow, we need to learn how to also give ourselves time, "me time". Still working on that one myself. I would like to accomplish such a lot with my life. Feel there is loads for me to gain and experience from this life.
Have difficulty choosing myself over my family. The guilt is so much that its safer I don't even consider it.

At some point I will get there. For now, focusing on my loved ones is my joy.

No matter what is happening in your own life or surrounding you, don't ever forget you're a brilliant mommy.

Curly hair Ladies

Okay...

So this blog is different. It's been brought to my attention. My blogs have been deep (quite unlike myself). So I thought I'd do something about hair, curly hair.
Not the easiest hair to work with, at least never boring.

Sometimes I do wish I had straight (wash and go) hair. Then I remember I would get bored with that quite quick. People with straight hair have limited options. Straight or straight, they are forced to use poisonous options like hairspray in order to get the slightest curl.

While curly girls are totally blessed. We do have a few difficulties.
The dreaded 'frizz'. Gosh humidity is our greatest enemy. Looking like we escaped one of Frankenstein's strange experiments. A good hair mask once a week and hair treatments work like a charm.

Also brittle hair, that tangles in an instant. For that we have detanglers, Quite grateful for them. The tears flow a bit less also hair breakage is minimized.

Fortunately we are in a time where everything is easily available to us. Precious internet...!
Many options to browse through. Great tips on sites like Google and YouTube. All depending on what your hair requirements are. Also loads of natural ingredients that are easily available, in your very own kitchen.

I definitely treat both mine and my four year old daughters hair, at least weekly. The results are stunning.
Some of my favorite products to use are;
Yogurt, Egg, Fresh Milk, Coconut oil, Olive Oil to name a few.

Once a month it's a good idea to also do a vinegar rinse, to remove any and all impurities from your hair. Will also leave your hair shiny and glossy.

Regardless to your hair type, always be sure to use heat protection before using any heat to style your hair. Leave-in-conditioners are also great investments.

Be sure to also get regular trims.

Check out 'dry wrapping'. The results are amazing.

Give your luscious locks breathing room and go natural.

With your next hair emergency, Don't waste money on some product the probably might not work, but also contains tons of harmful ingredients. When you will get better results at home, for free!

All the best on your hair journey. Enjoy and embrace your uniqueness and gorgeous locks.

May everyday be a great hair day!!!! You deserve it!

Embrace yourself completely

It constantly surprises me how much life has changed. Seems like only yesterday things were so different. Life was simple. The only person I had to take care of, was myself. Today, I am responsible for so many more lives. It's quite daunting. I still find myself amazed at how awesome my life has turned out. 

There is no way I would change any aspect of my life. With all it's peaks and valley's, it is lead me to this point. There is still so much more to learn and experience. When the time is right I will start those journeys. For now these speed bumps on the path I follow build and add to my character. 

Aspects of my personality have changed numerous times and quite likely will continue to do so. Keeps life interesting and everyone on their toes. Sometimes I even manage to surprise myself. 

Everyone has opinions as to how they feel I should live life. Yet they don't have the faintest idea who I am. Others are trying to 'figure me out'. Why? Is your life truly that empty? 

People need to learn to mind their own business. Allow people to just be. How is it any of your concern what others are doing with their lives? I honestly wonder, if I were to take a magnifying glass and start analyzing your life, what would I find? What would I learn about you as a person? 

Difference between me and them? I don't care, my own life is way more interesting. 

I am now learning there is no shame in the past. I don't enjoy nor do I appreciate people pitying me. Yes I have experienced things some of my elders would never understand. That doesn't mean those experiences weren't meant for me.I survived each of those situations. Walked away much stronger and wiser (hopefully). 

I will not go into any details as to what the past holds. Maybe one day when I'm ready. That will not be today.

Sometimes the past still haunts me like a terrible nightmare, As would be expected. Then I need to remind myself where I currently am. That I have already won my battles against those terrible 'monsters'. That I AM a winner, survivor, fighter. That I am capable of overcoming anything. 

So if you ever find yourself with your back up against the wall with the 'monsters' hovering over you. whispering lies in your ears. Stand tall push back and shout "I have already survived you, your'e powerless over me". Watch them vanish into nothingness. That's what they are, NOTHING.

Keep keeping on. Remind yourself you an amazing specimen of God. Already a victor over every battle heading your way. 

More details on the kiddos.

Started this blog early this morning, no surprise the internet connection has been terrible all day. so now I finally get my chance...

Goodness me, woke up this morning feeling absolutely yucky. Upside, Jaimee-Lyn is much better also it's school holidays, so Keano is by his father. So no school stress there either.

Unfortunately, that does change anything else, still need to cook and clean. House is a complete disaster. How is it possible that so few people can make such a huge mess?

I am quite determined to continue blogging regardless what happens or needs to happen. As I feel there is a possibility that this could be quite therapeutic. Hopefully, these those reading these blogs could gain something from this.

So today's topic...
KIDS...

Everyone's favorite topic.
So I didn't go into much detail as far as my kids or my family goes, Figure I will get there eventually.

My son Keano (13 years old) has ADHD which has proven to be quite a task for us. He is an absolute gem of a child. sweet, loving, caring, I couldn't ask for a better child. Since our very first meeting, a sweet peaceful and calm baby. He concentration time is limited to where unless constantly monitored, he gets easily distracted and tends to leave tasks incomplete. He was on Ritalin but the guilt was killing me. Felt like I was drugging my child up. Not that I think anyone is wrong for using it, personally it was something I struggled with. At first he took the medication without any issues. Then I started noticing he was rejecting it. Tried to convince him to take it. Until I decided it's time to try other alternatives. Currently downloaded a concentration app. He has not yet tried it. But as soon as I can sort out a 'quiet time' space in the house I will try it. Also heard of a herbalist who can assist with any and all issues, so when I get a chance definitely going to take him for a consultation. I prefer alternate remedies anyway, esp where my children are concerned.

Moving on. Next is little Miss Jaimee-Lyn (4 years old). This little lady is a constant ball of energy. She is the first person I've met who doesn't need to recharge or change batteries. From the moment she opens her eyes she is on the go. Also non-stop speaking. I'm stunned daily that such a tiny person has such a varied vocabulary. (I know a few adults who struggle with basic English.).
My biggest fight with her is her lack of sleep. Ongoing since she was a little bitty baby. Tried all sorts of weird and wonderful ideas. All failed. She is still foreign to the sleep concept. Wakes during the night just to look for me...
This is affecting me quite badly because I'm the type of person who respects my sleep, I need a fairly okay nights sleep to partially function as a subhuman (because that's what mommies are).

Feeling quite groggy due to this yucky flu. So hopefully Jaimee does me a solid and GOES TO SLEEP.

That's me for now. The stupid internet needs to play along so that I can vent my emotions.

Be Blessed and enjoy each and every moment with your little treasures...!

Here we go...

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Well... this is the beginning of who knows what? I must admit, I am both terrified and frightened as I venture on this new and exciting journey.

Hopefully the material I provide will be moderately entertaining. As well as an outlet for majority of my "crazy" that I do my utmost to contain, in hopes of protecting my loved ones.

Okay, I guess best place to start is with an introduction. I am Abigail Lewis, mother of 3 absolutely beautiful kids. My eldest is Keano, an amazingly loving young man who has started me the journey of motherhood. Which I definitely often fear and dread. Keano will be 13 years old in December.

Then we have Lyle. He drowned 7 years ago. He would have been 11, also in December. I must admit some days are more difficult than others, dealing with the loss of a child. Lots of people have told me to give it time, time heals all wounds. Though, personally, I believe that with time we learn how to handle our hurt better. I honestly can't imagine living without this hurt. It has become a part of who I am. After all a child is but only another extension as to who we are as mothers...

And finally, we have Jaimee-Lyn, A busy 4 year old who keeps me on my toes 24/7. I feared I would completely forget and lose all traces of Lyle once she was born. I am quite glad that I haven't. She has so many of his traits. Which pushes me to be more protective of her, beside her being a girl, obviously...

I have an amazing man, Barry. Who since the very beginning of our relationship saw something within me that I still today have trouble seeing. It still stuns daily that someone could love me to the degree that he does. Even on my days when I see no way forward. He is there right beside me always pushing me on. Never allowing me to give up. I suppose that's one of the many things I completely love about him, he is BESIDES me, not in front or behind.

Okie dokie, that would be all for now. Will drop in again. and download some more issues.

Whoever is reading... Thank you for you time...